Status Of Women In Pashtoon Society
Pakhtun culture, civilization and history is centuries old. It has its origin in the Pakhtun language and nation. Pashto language which is almost five thousand years old is not only a language but a code of life called Pakhtoonwali. It is such a code which covers all aspects of the Pakhtun way of life. Pakhtuns live their lives according to the code prescribed for them by Pakhtunwali. Anyone who ceases to follow this code ceases to be a true Pakhtun or a member of the Pakhtun code. All those traits or virtues which design Pakhtoonwali make an ideal Pakhtoon. These virtues are courage, honor, loyalty, truthfulness, justice self-respect, hospitality and so on. Paktoons live their lives according to Pakhtoonwali. Their customs regarding the decisions about their lives has been set by the same code. Pakhtuns who do not follow the rules and principles set by Pakhtoonwali are treated with indignity in the Pakhtoon society. It sometimes becomes very cruel as individuals find themselves helpless in front of this code as has been mentioned in a tappa;
Pakhtu as a code of life gets cruel and inhuman, as one has to sacrifice a lot to observe it strictly. A pakhtun beloved is asking her lover to get ready for any consequences to live up to the standard of Pakhtunwali.
Pakhtunwali does not exist in written form. It is based on conventions and practices left to them from their forefathers. The psyche, culture and trends of a nation are moulded by the geography, environment and economic conditions of the region where they live. Poverty and backwardness leads people towards ignorance. Poverty and ignorance is a curse and is a great hurdle in the way of constructive and objective thinking. Constructive thinking is followed by constructive activity. Pakhtoons are generally poor. Their living is mainly dependent on agriculture but a larger part of the land is not fertile. A Pakhtoon woman has to wait for the fulfillment of her smallest desires for long i.e.; till the reaping of crops. If there is a good crop, she gets the gift promised to her by the husband;
One of the reasons of the poverty of these people has been that this land has remained deprived of industrialization. No attention has been given by the authorities to the welfare and betterment of this region.
Pakhtoon society comprises of different tribes (both the Pakhtuns of Afghanistan and N.W.F.P). Pakhtuns live in the settled area, mountains and the tribal area of Pakistan. The former are flexible as compared to the very rigid pakhtuns of mountains and of the tribal area. Like people in other societies pakhuns can also be divided into upper, lower and the middle class. Women of the upper class cannot break the social shackles. They are bound by conventions and restrictions. Women of the lower class work side by side with men. The y cannot get education due to financial problems. Change has taken place only in the lot of women of the middle class. It is the middle class in societies which works for the progress and prosperity.
As due to the geographical and environmental conditions Pakhtuns live a hard and tough life which is followed by extreme temperament. They are intolerant and impatient people. Extreme moods make them take any action even at the cost of their lives;
Pakhtoon women have also got extreme moods. They are not afraid of death and willingly make sacrifices for the family honour. Despite all the restrictions on her in all walks of life, pakhtun women know how to live her life with dignity and honour which gives her a distinguished position. She is the preserver of Pakhtun culture. She possesses knowledge and wisdom and always upholds the banner of peace as pakhtun man talks only through the language of gun. Pakhtuns have never worked for the promotion of peace. Enmities and hostilities in this society last for even centuries. People who work for peace and settlements are discouraged and considered as cowards.
Pakhtun society is not sympathetic towards women. A young woman whose husband dies spends all her life with a small child. Male children are brought up with the intention to kill the murderer of his father. Pakhtuns never forgive their enemies and always wait for a chance to avenge them as it's expressed by a Pashto proverb:
Pakhtuns love strong moral character. They do not allow morally corrupt people to stay around them i.e.; in the neighborhoods or villages. Women cannot even think of marrying the man of her choice. Woman are never encouraged to live alone. Divorce, illicit relations, runaway marriages and prostitution is strongly condemned by the Pakhtuns. They openly condemn and discourage such acts which bring disgrace to the honour of families and lead to enmities between families. Punishments for the immoral acts are severe and while dealing with such cases Pakhtuns even set aside law and religion. Even in such cases woman suffers more then man or in plain words we can say that such punishments are designed for women. Whatever the drawbacks of pakhtun code, it is an undoubted fact that Pakhtun society is free from the moral evils from which most societies suffer.
Pakhtuns consider their honour and dignity supreme to everything. They never want their women to be humiliated and insulted openly. Every pakhtun is strictly vigilant to his family honour and neither does he interfere in the affairs of others. They do not give their daughters to those who possess low oral character and enjoy no respects in society. At the same time they do not consider it important to get her will in decisions regarding her. Daughters, sisters and wives are not given share in inheritance. Amongst the feudals it is not even considered important that she should get married because of the fear of losing her property. Women have no choice but to bow down their heads to the authority of man or otherwise they face strong condemnation from the family. In most cases women go against their nature and sacrifice because of the fear of family and the society.
Pakhtuns live in joint families. They cannot act independently mainly because of the heads of families. They have to obey their elders regarding the very important decisions of their lives even if the decisions are wrong. Individuals cannot act independently out of the fear of social boycott. It is such a society in which the lives of individuals are destroyed by the cruel practices and customs. Only few people have the courage to go against the norms.
A pakhtun woman sacrifices her wishes for the sake of her family. She lives her life in strict purdah in her parent's home from where she goes to her husband's home where she spends the rest of her life in complete obedience. She has got no right to say "no" to any decision regarding her as this is against the worms. The birth of a daughter is not welcomed as against the birth of a son which is celebrated. Men can marry twice and even thrice in order to provide a male hair to the family. A woman who has many sons born to there enjoys honour and respect in the family.
Pakhtun woman supports her family in different ways. She stands by her family through all trials and tribulations. She works in the fields, brings water, looks after the cattle and home and trains children; Pakhtun woman trains her male child in such a way as to enhance all the noble traits in him. She idealizes men of strong character. Pakhtoons possess strong moral character and all those foreigners who have come in close contact with them are a witness to it.
Pakhtun woman enjoy few powers and rights yet she has many responsibilities to fulfill. She knows fully well what is expected of her and stands still and firm in the face of any circumstances. Men love weapons and consider them important for self-defense. A Pakhtun woman does not hesitate from the use of weapons if it becomes unavoidable for the sake of honour and dignity. As she considers honour supreme over everything and prefer death to disgrace. Pashto folk poetry abounds in expressing such feelings of women;
Pakhtoon woman lives all her life to uphold the principles of true love-loyalty sincerity and faithfulness. She does not violate the trust reposed in her. Her life is the symbol of unfulfilled wishes and sacrifices. Even in the worst of circumstances she never utters a single word of complain as she knows that such an act would be a shame and dishonour to what is expected of her. In the absence of males she defends the family honour and dignity at any cost. What she can do is to ask her fiance or husband to come back to his land;
She does not stop men from fighting for the honour of religion or motherland. If necessary, she would willingly go into the battlefield with them to encourage them in the noble and exalted cause. They encourage man in their songs to fight till the end as running away from the battlefield would be great shame;
Pakhtun woman is like a spring of water in the mountains and a fresh flower in the deserts. She is a source of consolation and solace to man. But she has always been treated with injustice and inequality. She is even given to the enemies in exchange for peace-making and suffers for the ill-deeds of men in the most inhuman practice (swara).
The in-laws treat her with in-dignity and humiliation; Due to the social restrictions and exploitation pakhtun woman has been unable to prove her talents and potentials in learning and literature. Nature has blessed man and woman alike with both intelligence and feelings. It is the society which deprive them of opportunities still many women have proved themselves in the field of learning and literature and politics. Their names deserve credit and respect. They are Zaitoon Bano, Salma Shaheen, Fauzia Anjum, Syeda Bushra Begum, Begum Naseem Wali Khan, Begum Zari Sarfaraz, Alaf Jana Khattak and Syada Qanita Begum. It is hoped that the achievements of these ladies will encourage other women to come forward and do commendable job for the society. It is also hoped that as changes are talking place in all parts of the world and there have been efforts for modernization, the same can be hoped for the lot of Pukhtoon woman. The need is for bringing healthy changes in every system not a western-modernization but a modernization based on our values. She also needs financial independence, which can win her the real freedom.
(Pashto Academy, Peshawar University)
Written By: Prof. Dr. Salma Shaheen
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